Inside the Work: 6 Healing Truths from Trauma Therapy

As a trauma therapist, I’ve had the privilege of sitting with people during some of their most painful and powerful moments. Over time, I’ve noticed certain patterns that show up again and again, no matter someone’s story. These lessons are not just for therapy sessions. They are for all of us. Whether you’re healing from trauma yourself or supporting someone who is, these six insights offer a grounded, compassionate look at what helps people truly begin to heal.

Tips from the Therapy Room

1. Honor How You’ve Coped
   The way you’ve handled pain or stress wasn’t random. It helped you survive. Even if those patterns no longer serve you, they once kept you safe. Acknowledge them with respect and thank them for their service. Then, with support from a trusted therapist, begin to release what is no longer needed so you can make room for growth and lasting change. Visualize a symbolic retirement ceremony for your survival skills as you learn to lay them to rest in order to embrace living without having to operate out of survival mode.

2. Your Body Holds the Story
   Healing isn’t just about your thoughts. Your body carries important signals such as tight shoulders, a clenched jaw, racing heart etc. These sensations aren’t flaws. They’re clues, offering insight into what you’ve been through and what still needs care. With a safe and trusted therapist, healing happens slowly and gently by noticing these body cues and learning to acknowledge them without becoming overwhelmed, panicked, or shut down. Over time, your body can become a source of guidance and strength as you listen and notice…as you bear witness to and befriend yourself.

3. Safety is Life Changing
   As you begin processing painful memories or emotions, it is important to feel safe, both in your body and in your relationships. This might look like practicing grounding skills, building self-compassion and surrounding yourself with people who feel steady and supportive. A consistent, trusting relationship with your therapist can also help repair the impact of past relational wounds and support the development of secure attachment over time.

4. Healing is not Linear
   Healing isn’t a straight line. There will be ups, downs and moments where things feel stuck or unclear. That doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong…it means you’re human and the process is unfolding in its own time. Some days may feel light and hopeful, while others bring setbacks or old patterns. This is all part of the work. It sounds frustrating and cheesy, but you have to be willing to trust the process. What matters most is not how fast you’re moving, but that you’re still showing up. You’re still swinging and you’re still learning. Trust that even slow progress is still progress.

5. Notice the Small Shifts
   Recognizing a trigger, taking a breath, or choosing to pause instead of shutting down may seem small, but these moments matter. You are shifting your ability to respond rather than react. These subtle and small shifts are signs of growth and evidence that healing is happening. You are transforming my friend!

6. Let Yourself Be Seen
   You don’t have to have it all figured out to deserve connection and care. Healing often begins when you feel seen, heard and accepted by someone who offers safety and understanding. Many people carry the belief that they have to be “better” before reaching out or that their pain is too much to share. But the truth is, being met with compassion in your messiest, most vulnerable places can be a powerful part of the healing process. In the presence of someone who truly sees you without judgment, it becomes possible to lower your guard, rebuild trust and begin feeling connected again, both to others and to yourself.